Stumbled across this interesting site. Different “writers” post short, imagined monologues. In keeping with recent Comic Sans humor, I propose this short ditty:
I’m Comic Sans, Asshole. By Mike Lacher
You think I’m a malformed, pathetic excuse for a font. Well think again, nerdhole, because I’m Comic Sans, and I’m the best thing to happen to typography since Johannes fucking Gutenberg.
link
While you are on the site, you mine as well check this beauty out as well.
The Guy Who Wrote the Floating Text at the Beginning of Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back Critiques the Floating Text of Star Wars: The Return of the Jedi, Using a Series of Animated PowerPoint Slides That Involve a Number of Compromising Photos of George Lucas. By Eric Fershtman

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“People love me. Why? Because I’m fun. I’m the life of the party. I bring levity to any situation. Need to soften the blow of a harsh message about restroom etiquette? SLAM. There I am. Need to spice up the directions to your graduation party? WHAM. There again. Need to convey your fun-loving, approachable nature on your business’ website? SMACK. Like daffodils in motherfucking spring.”
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[...] including Cleveland Cavs owner, Dan Gilbert—which is pretty entertaining (note his use of comic sans and air quotes). Although I gotta say, this wonderfully ugly Letter to Cleveland wins as my [...]
[...] Everyone hates comic sans, everyone. But why? Designer David Kadavy explains exactly why Comic Sans is the bane of every type-lover’s existence. [...]